last week in pictures

April 11, 2012

last  week was a pretty good time.

1. my current reading stack: Speaking with the Angel, Stealing Rembrandts, The Subterraneans (rereading), Breakfast of Champions (rereading), Crisis on Infinite Earths, American Gothic: Sixty years of horror cinema

2.  Finally fixed these glasses.

3.  Easter tie: Thrift Store find!

4.  B.J. Whitmer after his brutal street fight match for Absolute Intense Wrestling

5.  A bloody B.J. Whitmer.

6.  Tim Donst after he put someone else through that table

Advertisements

The one with the lettuce

October 28, 2010

Hello kiddies. It’s time once again for us to delve back into the gross and disgusting. This TMI Thursday happened last night. It usurped the TMI post I had planned to write about. Today would have chronicled the making of Brownaconda: Dead Duck but that can come next week.

No today’s post is by special request by the wife.

It's A Trap Pictures, Images and Photos

I know this. I know it’s a trap. How? Well the reason she wants me to post this is she wants it to shine a bad light on me. She wants all of you to be on her side. It also proves how funny she actually feels it was, and it really was.

Last night was the Cavs home opener. It was a blast. I of course went with (and thanks to) the rizza. We pre-gamed at Cleats because the beers at the Q are 7.25. There we had 2 miller lights and a shot. I guess the blood work that was done earlier helped the buzz because my head was nice and warm when we left. From there we cheered our asses off for our Cavs. They won! This is not the point though. We shared 2 beers. To celebrate we all went to get a drink after the game.

The wifey and I headed home and to our chipotle salad bowl dinner. We watched an episode of HIMYM as we ate. Then we just sort hung around with the tv on. She of course was staying up too late yet again. When she finally decided to head off to slumberland I was still enjoying the remnants of my buzz. I sat on the couch and she straddled me. That’s right.

BOW CHIKA BOW BOW

Finally another TMI sex post. No I’m just kidding. It was just time for a kiss or two, or so I thought. Instead she started to shake my head and face whilst talking to me like I was the cat. She flipped her fingers on my lips to cause the blub blub blub sound. Then a kiss on the cheek and lips and a hug. Soon it was back to the above face shaking.

She is a weird one.

Then one big kiss right on the lips. Hold it. Hold it. And then she opened her eyes wide and held the kiss. Staring creepily into my eyes with her lips on mine. At this point I could feel a piece of lettuce in my mouth so as pay back I pushed it out of my mouth and onto/into hers.

I then said “did it..” when she freaked.
“Yeah it worked! I was hoping that would happen!” But she flipped!

I mean FLIPPED (Probably rightfully so but still it was funny.) Now to be fair I was not attempting to put it in her mouth but you know hey that happens right? She like jumped off and ran off. She ran off through the hallway yelling gross the whole way. Right into the bathroom she went. She started putting water in her mouth and spitting out.

She started to brush her teeth furiously and then even gargled. The whole time she was telling me I was gross and that I was sleeping on the couch. Which only made it seem funnier. I was going to say sorry but she was making me laugh. Then for a second she cracked a smile but then in an ultimate actress stunt began to over exaggeratedly gag.

Exaggerated gag.
Exaggerated gag.

And you guessed it exaggerated gag. We got in bed and she claimed she’d never ever get the thought of it out of her head. It would haunt her for the rest of her life.

Over exaggerated bed gag. (bow chikka bow bow)

Finally she calmed down as she lay in bed. I told her this was too funny not to TMI. She said that I should because then you all could see how disgusting I was, and be mad at me too. This morning I decided I’d rather do the Brownaconda post but she insisted I do this one.

I still maintain it was funny.

*Ackbar photo from Utepeis


TMI Thursday: Wrong bloody bathroom lady!

February 11, 2010

Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!
TMI Thursday

Well, Hello neighbor! Look, its Thursday again. Wow! Did you know it was Thursday again already? I bet you did. You look real smart. Do you know what Thursday means neighbor? That’s right…hold on let me take my shoes off….it means it is….now my sweater….TMI Thursday! Do you like TMI Thursday? Okay enough of the cheap Mr. Rogers impersonation. I’m not sure why I even had the urge to do that (Other than the fact that I was getting naked as I typed this.)

I’m just kidding.

I was naked the whole time.

Joking.

Or am I?

Anynaked time for my TMI Post. This one harkens back a couple of months. It goes back to my first bout with the cough from hell. Sadly for all of you I do not have a picture to go with it. I know I know but do try to cheer up.

So I was at work and the cough at this point was (probably) at its worst. I was coughing hard just about every minute with instances of prolonged fits. So much coughing (and so hard) that there were blood vessels bursting and my face looked terrible. I looked like patient zero in a zombie flick. I was coughing and spitting stuff up at a pretty good clip. I mean I was a pro at it….hmmm perhaps I can find a way to get paid for it. No? Okay. It was at the point where there was blood in the crap I was spitting up. This day was no different. Well except for what happened. So I was feeling like crap. I didn’t sleep much the night before and had considered calling off. I of course did not. So I’m at work and the cough hasn’t been too bad. I had enough control to make it to the back or to the bathroom when I was gonna have a bad amount of coughing. This is one of those trips. I get into the bathroom and cough till my face is red, afterwards I stood in front of the sink trying to collect myself. My nose had been bothering me. It felt real sore, dry but every time I coughed it seemed to fill up. So I blew my nose and some stuff came out but it (my nose) felt filled. So after another blow with no success I succumbed to desperation. I moved closer to the sink and pushed one finger to my nose and

Blew!

Everything in my nose, head and body appeared to come out. It hurt like hell too. I coughed and coughed and when I looked up there was blood, snot and god knows what sprayed all over the sink. Son of a bitch! I turn to get some paper towels and what do I see?

A woman is standing in the doorway switching from me to the sink and back again. She had one of the most horrified looks on her face I’ve ever seen. She said “I thought this was the ladies room” and ran out.

Yeah. Awesome.


%d bloggers like this: