Here we go edition number 11 of Conversations with Jimi!
(As I’m listening to my MP3 player on the bus a guy sits next to me.)
Guy with ipod: I’m listening to John Mayer what are you listening to?
Me: (Turns volume up.)
Guy who doesn’t get my humor: And that is the organ and the organ pipes. Very expensive so when checking you want to be careful.
Me: Oh but I know how to play; maybe I could play a little?
Guy who doesn’t get my humor: No you don’t want to do that.
Me: (Cover half my face and mimic playing with my other hand.): Oh I was just going to do a little Phantom of the Opera.
Guy who doesn’t get my humor: No you can’t touch it at all.
Coworker: How are you doing?
Me: Call me Count Duckula because I’m just ducky.
(I see the Star Wars sheets have been replaced.)
wifey: Did u just boo me for taking the star wars sheets off?
Manager: Why do u say & do so many odd things?
Me: No one on the corner has swagga like moi
Manager: I don’t even know that that means
Coworker: Support our troops that’s a nice thought & bag.
Me: Yeah but it’s star wars bag, see they’re Storm Troopers.
(I walk into her watching “Murder She Wrote” and Jessica Fletcher says something mean to someone.)
Me: Jeez what a bitch.
(Wife ignores me.)
Me: Why are u ignoring me?
Wifey: Because you’re dissing Jessica