Now some of you may know me as a bit of a joker.
I maintain it is just a rumor. So it is generally expected that on April fool’s day I’d be a prank playing er well fool. There is only roadblock: The wifebot. She grew up with a dad who was (and is) a real joke player. He would get her real good when she was young. Flash forward to when she finds her amazing knight in shining armor.
She is always “on” because she really never knows when one of us will try to pull another joke. I guess ever day is April fool’s day with us.
(Don’t even say it.)
So this means she is always watching with a skeptical eye. I will like to state for the record that as of recently I’ve not tried any real April fool’s day pranks on her. I have however spent a while thinking of some of them. I at the very least like to come up with them and then tell her about them later. So here are a few:
Divorce one: I wanted someone to call the house and leave a message on the answering machine. The message would make it appear that they were some sort of divorce attorney returning my call about papers. (I tried to get someone to do this but nobody would help.)
There was the apartment broken into one: When it neared the time she’d be coming home I’d open our apartment door. I’d hide our computers and tv set and then hide in the closet and wait till she came home.
Cop trouble: When I worked at Zagara’s there would be a cop at the store. As she waited for me to get out of work I wanted him to go give her trouble. Tell her she couldn’t park there, her music was too loud, pretend to give her a ticket.
Facebook fight (This one was more about others than her.): I’d leave a post on her facebook saying basically fuck off and then make my status something like “you think you know someone after spending 13 years with them!”
Job: I was going to call her and tell her I was offered a job.
Lost kitty: Stick Rasputin in the laundry room and then tell her he got out of the building. (way mean!)
Work uniform: I was going to hide her work uniform.
False alarm: I was going to cover up the cable box (to hide the time.) and then set the alarm for an hour earlier. See how long she goes before noticing.
Eviction Notice: I was going to type up a letter claiming we were going to be evicted and tape it to our front door.
Car changes: I would adjust things in her car and then burn a country music cd and put it in the cd player at full blast.
Creeper caller: Have a friend of mine call her and leave her a message (with her name) about being in love with her and wanting to be with her and watching her etc…
Those are just some (remember I really just like to come up with them). She must be so glad she married me.