Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!
It’s Thursday once again—a day I didn’t think I’d see the way the week was going. The way the show was going. I hadn’t planned on doing a TMI post this week. I actually didn’t think I was going to post anything this week (after the shameless plug) but seeing as this is the last official one I felt I had to.
I think it’s pretty clear I enjoyed doing these posts. They’ve allowed me to open up in a completely different and wonderful way.
Poop stories are opening up in a wonderful way?
Well at least in a completely comfortable and well eventually expected way. I’m sure I’ll bust out with the tmi’s every now and again still. I mean I did enjoy making people squirm. I was working on a post about just how much I’ve enjoyed/almost obsessed over coming up with the tmi posts. That will come. But first:
TMI Thursday: The one that really burned her ass.
Not the burn one would think of. It happened of course with the crazy chicken pox raping girl. Most of the weird stuff in my sexual history did. You’ve probably already guessed that. So dear family do look away if you don’t want to see the sex stuff again. I say family but mostly it’s just my sister Lisa. Anyhoo look away.
This is indeed about sex. Not just sex, but sex at work. Now I use to work with my parents in their cleaning business. We cleaned an office building. At some point the girlfriend came along, and would either help or sit off to the side and read. On this particular night she helped clean. She cleaned faster than I ever saw her clean and it meant we were done way before my parents. Now we could’ve gone down and helped the rents but she had something different in mind.
As I checked on things she came up behind me and rubbed my crotch. She then whispered she brought a condom and let go of me. I knew I was getting a quickie and turned around to find she was already finished undressing herself. She didn’t want any foreplay she just wanted the sex to begin. I obliged. I just dropped trou and boxers and prepared to bump uglies and what not. It just so happens that where she tossed her shirt was a perfect spot to protect my knees.
You see we were on a carpet.
Yeah and well we went at it rather hard for about 15-20 minutes and then hurriedly dressed. As we did you could see the big long red marks all up the back of her legs and ass. The nice track of rug burn all up her back and she actually claims in between her ass cheeks and on her crack. Soon it really began to hurt her and she walked a bit funny and winced every now and then when she sat down for a little while.