Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!
Seeing that today is April fool’s Day I’m going to go with a jokier one. It really isn’t all that gross but I suppose that depends on your point of view. The wife thinks that it is just the epitome of awesome/funny.
(I’m not calling any of you hoes.)
(Except for you over there.)
(Yeah you know who you are.)
Anytmi, as many of you know (I use that a lot) I started doing Yoga. I’m doing it every single day and rather enjoying it. It’s not the traditional Yoga per se (I just like saying per se.) It’s Yoga for Regular guys by Diamond Dallas Page. I feel like I’ve said this 40 times. So it has a lot of the same moves (some with variations) but given “manlier” names I guess.
Sometime last week whilst learning the moves I wanted to make sure I was doing the poses right and get them down in the right order in my head. I asked the wifey to watch/tell me which ones were coming up. Only problem was I believe we were about to go somewhere. This meant I was wearing jeans. I started to do the moves and well it wasn’t really working. The wife mentioned it was probably the jeans so I of course just ripped them right off.
There I was naked from the waist down on my back with my knees up like I was about to do a sit-up (pinfall position.) My pants are across the room and I keep going pantless. I should paint a somewhat picture of the positioning. I was in the living room on the rug pointed (on my back) toward the big comfy chair she was sitting on. This I assure you truly is not a pretty sight at all, but I was intent on getting them down pat. Of course the wifey violated my exposed bottom and man parts with her perverted eyes and then giggling.
First up were ones such as: knee twists, deeper knee twists and cross legged stretch.
Then there was Bridge Position which garnered giggles:
But what sent her lustful gaze and giggling into hyper drive was Dead Bug:
and human ball:
Now hardly a day goes by where she doesn’t ask if I did it pantless or sometimes she’ll just blurt out “pantless yoga” and giggle.
And since I know you all are wondering, no I don’t do it without pants.
Also now you all know I don’t often wear underwear of any kind. You’re welcome.