A little from the what the fizzle files

From the “What the Fizzle?” file:

Are you a big fan of good old Saint Nick and like Potato chips? Well than do we have a deal for you apparently! There is a chip on eBay that is apparently shaped like the jolly Saints head. The seller says it “Would look great on any tree and after Christmas it can be eaten.” How can anyone pass this up?

I’ll even pause to let you all rush over to eBay and bid……

Go on I won’t judge.

(I will.) Actually by the time I post this bidding will have ended but you get the point.

Done? Good. So yesterday while being creative loading up the apple display my store manager comes up to me and this happens:

Store manager: Hey Jim (I’m pretty sure I’ve cringed at being called Jim every single time he calls me it) you can come back to the Yahoo meeting.

Me: Uhm o……kay.

He walks off.

Now at this point I’m like what the hell? Is something going on with yahoo.com here? Then it was like lightning struck me brain. Yesssss same Hook reference for like the twentieth time!

Pause while I do some sort of celebratory dance.

So the punishment invitation was for a meeting we stole from Wal-Mart. It is this sort of pep rally like meeting they force on us in the middle of the store. They tell us upcoming news and etc and then finish with a hearty (yeah right) Go Zagara’s! Now is “Yahoo meeting” really the best way to describe your meeting? Are the only people who attend a bunch of yahoos? Perhaps that is the case. Either way when it came time to be all “Go Zagara’s” I of course said “yahoo!”

I leave you with this awesome heartfelt plea from a missed connection ad on Craigslist.

Titled: Those women in Lakewood
You know that place, everywhere. In the resale shops, at the bank, Natures Bin, at the Y working out, in your car on Detroit rd. All you single women in Lakewood! You dress so well, have careers, make-up done nice, plenty of money invested in your shoes anr hair. Your seemingly put together so well ..but have you cell phone pasted to your ear and your eyes buried in text messages. Take the time to look around. Not all us guys that toss you a smile are the meatheads that hang out at the bars. No need for the scowls. Some of us are indeed true men, have our “stuff” together, easy on the eyes, keep in shape and are decent people. We just find it hard to break the ice in this fast paced world where everyone is so self-important and indulged.

Take your guard down for just one minute and maybe we will bump into each other.


One Response to A little from the what the fizzle files

  1. carissajade says:

    I would so be creative if I got to be in charge of the fruits and such. I would make Mountain ranges and leave face holes…

    And that Craigslist ad was awesome. Could have been written to the ladies of Frisco (where I work near Dallas.)

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